When I was a child, creativity came easily.

I wrote most of a (terrible) novel when I was eight. (I sort of lost interest in it when I discovered that my ambition to be the youngest ever published author was not going to be fulfilled.)

I used to draw, sew, paint, write poems, make dolls’ furniture and undertake numerous other crafty activities at any and every opportunity.

Once, whilst my parents and Nanna snored through Christmas afternoon, I crafted an entire circus out of bits of paper and the foil wrappers off the contents of a tin of Quality Street.

(I gave the job of writing the sign for the big top to my little sister; her dodgy spelling resulted in “Biley Smatt’s Circus”.)

Anyway, the point is, there was never anything difficult about making, creating and doing arty things. It was fun, and it was second-nature.

Which, as an adult seeking to make a living from my creativity, it often hasn’t been. Not recently anyway.

Over the last few months of winter, post-Christmas and pre-anywhere-near-Spring, I would often get up, think about creating stuff to sell on Etsy – and then go and clean the kitchen floor.

Or browse Pinterest. Or make another cup of tea. Or find some other way to procrastinate through the cold day, until lad got home from school and I had an excuse not to try to create anything – except dinner.

However, ever since I went a bit quiet, I have given myself permission to not make anything. And, more importantly, not to feel guilty about it.

I knew I had to stop forcing it, to stop pulling myself up by my bootstraps and let go of the discomfort and looming panic that trying-too-hard was starting to induce.

The good news is… it seems to be working!

The urge to play with little bits of fabric has come back…

These little faces are fiddly enough to be a challenge (teeny-tiny stitches!) and capable of endless variations, so I don’t get bored.

Some are going to become flowers – hence Petal People.

I also made more itty bitty kitties…

And I have other ideas that I’m itching to stitch, too.

Of course, the turn of the seasons, the lack of an impending big birthday, lighter evenings, the approach of summer, all play their part.

It’s easy to forget that making things because you actually want to make them, rather than constantly trying to second-guess what other people might want you to make, is important when it comes to enjoying what you do.

Instead of struggling uphill, it’s nice to be freewheeling again. ♥