Well, it’s been a funny old year.

At the end of last year I did a fabulously successful fair at The Custard Factory in Birmingham. It was the first fair for which I had travelled out of Nottingham to sell my wares. The first time I had stayed away overnight to do a weekend-long market. The first time I had stayed overnight on my own anywhere for literally years.

It was terrifying! I think I was actually shaking with nerves as my partner drove me and my stall over to Brum.

Then we arrived and the fear translated itself into action and I set up my stand and met my lovely stall neighbours and saw the huge empty white room transformed into a hive of activity and creativity and decorative loveliness.

I had been allocated the most prominent stall pitch in the room – right opposite the main entrance. I was literally the first thing everyone saw as they entered the market. And it was a huge success! I nearly sold out! I did better than I had ever done, takings-wise. It put me on a huge high and made me feel that I really could do this, I really could make a success of my work.

So, after Christmas, I started 2020 with all sorts of goals and aspirations…

To find that my creative muse had upped and left. I had run out of ideas. My creative well had dried up.

And then the pandemic hit. I’ve written about how it made me feel in another post. I didn’t do any doll making for several months. I honestly thought for a while that I might never make another doll.

But to cut the story of this year short, time passes and as with all things, change comes. I signed up for a couple of creative coaching opportunities, because I really needed a kick up the arse and a few creative cheerleaders in my life. I got a commission from Sarah, which brought me purpose and focus and eventually, some acclaim.

I started making my own work again.

So here we are. Winter 2020. Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose, as they say.

The Paperdolls Market is this weekend. It is happening online this year, for obvious pandemic-related reasons. I have a smaller selection of dolls for sale than perhaps ideally I would have liked, but really I’m just hugely grateful and relieved and happy to be getting any work out there at all. These dolls are labours of love, all of them, and each one holds a tiny piece of my heart.

I hope people like them, and that some of the people who like them will buy some of them. (If you are interested in purchasing, you can find my wares in my shop).

And as for aspirations, well… I’m just going to keep on trying.

Because that’s all any of us can do really, isn’t it?

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